I Took My Kids Toys Away- Here’s What Happened
Every now and then, I make a questionable decision while parenting our kids.
This decision, however, reached an entirely new level.
Let me share the story behind the big reasons I took my kids’ toys away.
We all know parenting can be hard. Like, really, really hard. I am ALWAYS questioning myself and my decisions. Should I have said that? Was that a little overboard? Maybe I shouldn’t have said it that way?
The decision to make my kids’ toys away has been a long time coming. When they’ve been unkind or disrespectful, I’ve made the “threat” that one morning they were going to wake up and all of their toys would be gone.
Not to mention what happens when I ask my kids to help clean up the mess they’ve made. It’s ALWAYS a fight. ALWAYS. And honestly, I’m over the feeling of constantly nagging my kids. I’m tired of how I feel, the frustration I feel about always having to ask them to pick up after themselves, and also the frustration my kids feel when they hear me constantly telling them to do the same thing.
Now, before I continue, let’s talk about something. One could argue it’s my parenting that has made us arrive at this point. One could say that if my kids had more respect for me, they would listen the first time and do what was asked. (But there’s no need to pick apart my parenting today.)
In a perfect world, yes, that would happen. But as a homeschooling mom who is with my kids 95% of the time, nothing about my world is perfect. We ebb and flow as my kids grow and change. They do respect me, but sometimes, they just don’t listen.
One particular day recently, my kids were playing with an art set. When another one of my kids asked to participate, the response back stopped me in my tracks. “No, you can go get your own art kit!”
Does this child have their own art kit? Yes. Would this have been a solution? Yes.
But this particular situation was so much more than that.
It was about a hateful, selfish heart. And in our home, that is not acceptable.
I gave them an earful about how disrespectful and unkind their behavior was.
And I told them they had finally reached the point of me taking all their toys away. One morning they would wake up and everything out be gone. There were no more threats to be made- it was happening. As one would expect, my house went completely silent. If my kids know one thing about me, it’s that I keep my word. The toys were about to be gone.
As I continued folding laundry, I became more frustrated and disheartened over the situation. Why was I waiting to initiate the consequence of the action?
Oddly enough, I know with dogs and babies, the only way they can connect the action to the consequence or reward is to react immediately.
With that in mind, I decided now was the time to remove the toys. Bin by bin, I pulled the toys out of their rooms and put them in a location that was off-limits.
As I did this, I overheard one of my kids say, “She’s serious”. Yep, mom is serious and your toys are gone.
Now, you may be thinking- “You seriously took all their toys away, what are they going to do?”
I had to think quickly on my feet for this part because I wasn’t prepared. I went with the things I could come up with off the top of my head, with the idea of forcing creativity.
So, I gave them these things: They could practice piano, use any of the art/school supplies, get ahead on school work, read any books, and play with any of the toys outside.
Oddly enough, my kids were totally fine with this.
So, let’s fast forward to 3 weeks after I took my kids’ toys away.
THEY DON’T WANT THEM BACK!
Yes, you read that right. They don’t want them back. They’ve asked for one thing back, and then they want to have a huge yard sale.
They’ve become incredibly creative with their minds. They have used everyday items to replace the things they played with. I have let them play with their Legos twice, and we’ve played board games as a family.
When I made the spur-of-the-moment decision to take their toys away, I told my husband it would either be one of the best parenting decisions I’ve ever made, or it would be one of the worst parenting moves ever.
Let me tell you- taking my kids’ toys away has been one of the best parenting choices for our family. They’ve learned to live with less. Less chaos, less nagging, less picking up. They’ve learned to adapt to minimalism when it comes to things to choose from to play with. I’ve lowered the level of overstimulation by removing so many choices.
Sometimes, less truly is more. Don’t be afraid to make the hard parenting decisions that go against the “societal norms”. The well-being of your kids is your responsibility, not theirs.
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